Yes, I'm You're Friend, so I'm Only Going to Stab You in the Back a Little

I'm starting to believe the rumors and the reasons why people say Mexicans don't trust each other. From good friends in Playa to Mexicans themselves, they all seem to reiterate this so called cultural fact. Although such generalizations may help to give a cursory understanding of the culture here, I try to stay away from such broad classifications. I'm sure the same could be said about many Americans.

Generally speaking Mexicans only invite family into their home. Friends, business associates and others are met in cafes, bars, etc... and are generally never brought into the inner circle. I'm not sure if this is because people are ashamed of their homes, don't trust their friends and associates or if it's just the culture. I'm thinking it's a combination of all 3.

At the gas station the other day the attendant saw my Massachusetts license plate and began telling me that his brother is living and working near Boston. The attendant then began to relate how he himself was working in Michigan and his Mexican boss in Michigan stole all his money and that of all his fellow workers, so the attendant had to flee back to Mexico.

Another Mexican, a lovely girl in her 20s who works at the XCaret theme park, was telling us she traveled from Mexico City to Playa to visit her Aunt. However, when she arrived her Aunt stole all her money including her bus money and now she's stuck here.

It was my birthday the other day. As a surprise Allan arranged to have a party at a local bar for me and about 25 friends. This is an establishment that we visit almost daily for lunch, and have become friends with the manager and all the staff. I even translated their menu into English for free and have paid to have our business logo placed on their menus. Apparently when Allan was negotiating the price of the party the manager, someone we considered to be a friend, wanted an exhortation amount of money for the party - more than we would pay in the States. Allan almost walked out he was so mad. In the end Allan was able to negotiate the price of the party to a small fraction of what it was originally. (Think $700 USD down to $150 USD.) He apparently thinks were rich and dumb - or perhaps that's just how business is done here.

The party was a blast, but I can't stop thinking how this friend tried to screw us. I've been told that this is just how things operate here - you have to negotiate. Start high and then go down. However, I would never think for a moment of trying to rip off a friend - or even a client or someone I did not know for that matter. It's just not in my blood to take advantage of people. Granted the same situation could happen in the States. However, I've been told by many friends, Americans and Mexicans alike, that it's just how things are done down here and "that's why Mexicans don't trust each other."

I guess the jury is still out on this subject. I'm not entirely ready to give into the fact that most Mexicans are not to be completely trusted. Sure, I'm careful when having contractors come into my home. If I make Mexican friends I'm not going to assume they're going to rip me off at the first moment. I just don't want to generalize or not give someone the benefit of the doubt. Granted, my radar is always on and if I'm suspicious of someone I'll act accordingly. I'm trustful but not entirely naive or out of it. I'm fairly astute when it comes to reading people. However, there's always someone out there who flies under the radar who is looking to screw someone. Does this self-centered person live in the hearts of all Mexicans or just some of them? Is this person in us? Should I automatically be distrustful of all Mexicans or give them the benefit of the doubt (while keeping an eye on them) if they make it past my radar?

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